"Whoever said wedding planning was fun was a LIAR."
My engaged friend said this to me. I'll admit when I first heard her, I felt sorry that she wasn't enjoying herself. Then I realized that I was kidding myself if I thought I felt differently. Though wedding planning has had it's fun, rewarding moments especially for a control freak like myself... it's not really all that fun. The fairy tales and the movies have all lied to us, fellow naive people. Wedding planning is only fun if you've hired someone. Even then, I have no doubt that it's hard.
It's kind of like those 'fun' homework assignments the 'cool' teachers give you. Starts out fun but eventually you realize that the load isn't getting any lighter and you stopped having fun three projects ago. My outlook is a mix of bright and bleak. In the distance, I can see the bliss of The Day After. Everything is finished and Dan and I are on a plane. In front of me, Wedding Minutiae is taking me down. Never mind the big stuff like the dress, the flowers, the music, the program. There are a bajillion little things that are putting me over the edge. The never ever ever ending list of things to do. The chaos behind the scenes. The decisions upon decisions upon decisions... No one really talks about this side of weddings.
But there's another side to weddings people don't talk about. Enter wonderful fiance, wonderful family, and wonderful friends. In the same way a good cup of coffee opens your eyes, kicks you in the butt, and comforts you all in the same sip, these people can snap me out of my pity party and help calm my ever-anxious soul.
These folks help shift my focus from the wedding to the marriage. And in that regard, I am very much enjoying planning for this marriage. Counseling sessions with my pastor, receiving insight from married people and my parents, and getting advice and encouragement from all of my friends have been the highlights of this experience. There is a library of things I have to learn and the hard truth is I am a pretty terrible student. But so far, what it really comes down to is this:
When I look into that tunnel, I am failing to see God's abundant love and glory above all the minutiae. I am failing to see the Emmanuel of it all.
He is right here.
God is with us.
